Funnies of the Year!
Suresh Kalmadi
Trust Suresh Kalmadi to shoot himself in the mouth. In a major gaffe, the Organising Committee chairman thanked Princess Diana for attending the opening ceremony of the Games despite the princess being dead for 13 years now. Kalmadi mistook Camilla, the Duchess of Cornwall, as Diana and during a press conference, he said, “Yes, Princess Diana was there,” before hastily correcting himself. Fortunately, our former colonisers chose to overlook the historical blunder and did not freeze relations with India.
Lalit Bhanot (and his ‘hygienic’ issues)
More fodder from the Commonwealth Games. OC secretary-general Lalit Bhanot came out with another gem when he painted Indians as less clean than their white counterparts. After pictures of soiled mattresses and excreta-coated toilet walls were leaked to the BCC, Bhanot said, “These rooms are clean to both you and us. Foreigners want certain standards in hygiene and cleanliness which may differ from our perception.” The British media had a ball with headlines projecting the growing superpower as just another deprived third-world country.
Maradona (during the 2010 World Cup)
Even before he reached South Africa, the Argentine legend had already set the tone by promising to run naked through the streets of Buenos Aires if his team won the World Cup. In the dugout and on the sidelines, it was a spectacle watching the portly, grey-and-white bearded coach celebrate goals, curse and kiss players, even kick some balls. Watching Maradona do a little jig on the sidelines was akin to a plump woman shaking her booty. In another episode, a blunt Maradona asked Pele to go back to the museum when the Brazilian questioned his coaching ability.
Vuvuzelas
Is it a hive of bees? Is it a squadron of planes? No, it’s the ubiquitous vuvuzela! The African trumpet turned out to be both a boon and a bane. From young kids to grandparents, everyone sported one common accessory in South Africa --- the vuvuzela. The huge increase in volume in the stadiums resulted in ESPN using a filter to drown out some of the noise on television sets. A section of fans called it the most annoying musical instrument ever. After the vuvuzela, earplugs were the second most sold items in South Africa, to mitigate the atrocity of the sound on the human ear. After soaring in popularity and making a name (rather, a noise) for itself, the plastic horn has been appearing in cricket, football and rugby tournaments around the world.
Panathinaikos fan gives Lionel Messi the finger
How do you stop the World Player of the Year on the football pitch? During a Champions League match between Barcelona and Panathinaikos, a Pana fan invaded the pitch, ran around and came to stop bang in front of the ‘Flea’. As security guards swarmed around, the cheeky fan showed Messi the finger, while the Argentine stood there, wondering how to react. Maybe he was already thinking about the next award?
The fan was quickly brought down and carted away from the pitch.
Green’s blunder 2010 World Cup
Goalkeepers and blunders are not far behind. But when the error is as calamitous (and hilarious) as that of England keeper Robert Green, you can be assured of enough headlines to fill up the sports pages. During England’s opening group stage match against the USA, the poor keeper let a Clint Dempsey shot slip through his fingers, while bending to scoop the ball up. From ‘Hand of Clod’ to 'Stars and Tripe’ and ‘Butter-fingers’, Green made as forgettable a start to his World Cup as possible. Not to forget giving his team a much-needed boost, this also put England in the laughable category, after some very-entertaining (cue drab) performances in South Africa.
Luis Suarez celebrations
If Green’s missed save was a blunder in the real sense, Uruguayan striker Luis Suarez made the save of the tournament when he deliberately handled a last-minute goal-bound ball at the post to deny Ghana a place into the semifinals. It was the work of a cheat and Suarez resembled a chuckling baboon jumping up and down on the sidelines after Asamoah Gyan missed the resulting penalty. Uruguay’s celebration was incredibly funny, albeit in a vengeful way. The cheating became the new Hand of God.
Trust Suresh Kalmadi to shoot himself in the mouth. In a major gaffe, the Organising Committee chairman thanked Princess Diana for attending the opening ceremony of the Games despite the princess being dead for 13 years now. Kalmadi mistook Camilla, the Duchess of Cornwall, as Diana and during a press conference, he said, “Yes, Princess Diana was there,” before hastily correcting himself. Fortunately, our former colonisers chose to overlook the historical blunder and did not freeze relations with India.
Lalit Bhanot (and his ‘hygienic’ issues)
More fodder from the Commonwealth Games. OC secretary-general Lalit Bhanot came out with another gem when he painted Indians as less clean than their white counterparts. After pictures of soiled mattresses and excreta-coated toilet walls were leaked to the BCC, Bhanot said, “These rooms are clean to both you and us. Foreigners want certain standards in hygiene and cleanliness which may differ from our perception.” The British media had a ball with headlines projecting the growing superpower as just another deprived third-world country.
Maradona (during the 2010 World Cup)
Even before he reached South Africa, the Argentine legend had already set the tone by promising to run naked through the streets of Buenos Aires if his team won the World Cup. In the dugout and on the sidelines, it was a spectacle watching the portly, grey-and-white bearded coach celebrate goals, curse and kiss players, even kick some balls. Watching Maradona do a little jig on the sidelines was akin to a plump woman shaking her booty. In another episode, a blunt Maradona asked Pele to go back to the museum when the Brazilian questioned his coaching ability.
Vuvuzelas
Is it a hive of bees? Is it a squadron of planes? No, it’s the ubiquitous vuvuzela! The African trumpet turned out to be both a boon and a bane. From young kids to grandparents, everyone sported one common accessory in South Africa --- the vuvuzela. The huge increase in volume in the stadiums resulted in ESPN using a filter to drown out some of the noise on television sets. A section of fans called it the most annoying musical instrument ever. After the vuvuzela, earplugs were the second most sold items in South Africa, to mitigate the atrocity of the sound on the human ear. After soaring in popularity and making a name (rather, a noise) for itself, the plastic horn has been appearing in cricket, football and rugby tournaments around the world.
Panathinaikos fan gives Lionel Messi the finger
How do you stop the World Player of the Year on the football pitch? During a Champions League match between Barcelona and Panathinaikos, a Pana fan invaded the pitch, ran around and came to stop bang in front of the ‘Flea’. As security guards swarmed around, the cheeky fan showed Messi the finger, while the Argentine stood there, wondering how to react. Maybe he was already thinking about the next award?
The fan was quickly brought down and carted away from the pitch.
Green’s blunder 2010 World Cup
Goalkeepers and blunders are not far behind. But when the error is as calamitous (and hilarious) as that of England keeper Robert Green, you can be assured of enough headlines to fill up the sports pages. During England’s opening group stage match against the USA, the poor keeper let a Clint Dempsey shot slip through his fingers, while bending to scoop the ball up. From ‘Hand of Clod’ to 'Stars and Tripe’ and ‘Butter-fingers’, Green made as forgettable a start to his World Cup as possible. Not to forget giving his team a much-needed boost, this also put England in the laughable category, after some very-entertaining (cue drab) performances in South Africa.
Luis Suarez celebrations
If Green’s missed save was a blunder in the real sense, Uruguayan striker Luis Suarez made the save of the tournament when he deliberately handled a last-minute goal-bound ball at the post to deny Ghana a place into the semifinals. It was the work of a cheat and Suarez resembled a chuckling baboon jumping up and down on the sidelines after Asamoah Gyan missed the resulting penalty. Uruguay’s celebration was incredibly funny, albeit in a vengeful way. The cheating became the new Hand of God.
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