Phoren Diaries - Part 1
So IB did manage to reach the foreign shores safe and sound, without losing either his baggage or himself in the process. The only notable lameness on his part was the absence of a pen in his bag (which is an extremely serious error for a budding journalist). So to fill up the immigration form at the airport, IB had to shell out 100 bucks for a pen that just cost 10 bucks (included were the airport overheads, petrol tax, Vijay Mallya and Kingfisher tax and all such things that build up to a 10 times increase in the cost of anything at an international airport).
Anyway, IB reached Newcastle. And froze immediately when he realised that at a nippy 11 degrees Celsius, that was the warmest Tyneside was going to be. Poor thing. I can imagine him shivering (literally), with a nose as proverbially red as that of Rudolph. I am sure the boy from the sunnier climes of Madras will have his task cut out -- adjusting to all the snow and the beautiful winter surroundings.
Apparently IB hadn’t eaten anything for close to 24 hours. It is a major problem if you are a vegetarian – in Europe or US or China, among others. Rest assured you will never be spoiled for choice there, as far as food is concerned. In fact, you will possibly have to survive on bread, cheese, milk, vegetables, pasta, eggs and their various combinations. I have been telling IB to learn the basics of cooking. Unfortunately, he has never set foot in a kitchen. And until now, he used to brag that he wouldn't even enter one. Once, when he was asked to crack open an egg and whip it up, he broke it on the kitchen counter, so that all the yolk slithered down and formed a nasty-smelling puddle on the floor. Then it was left to the other person to perform the clean-up operations. I’m pretty sure if IB had tried to wipe off the egg, it would have led to another catastrophe.
IB cannot boil water. Or cook an omelette or scrambled eggs. He has learnt how to cut and dice vegetables and did a good job with them (it was with great relief I noted that all his fingers were still intact after he was done with the knife and the chopping board). Plus food in the UK is super-expensive. I wonder how IB will sustain himself, more importantly – WHAT will he sustain himself on? I told him how he could cook stir-fried vegetables, or scrambled eggs, or make pasta – none of them require a lot of effort and are pretty simple to organise, along with the ingredients. But IB is lazy. And says he will survive on chips and bread and cheese, along with water. I properly pity the boy. From a plate of paneer dosai and steaming tumblers of kaapi to chips from cold storage and dry bread -- what a change it will be!
Anyway, IB reached Newcastle. And froze immediately when he realised that at a nippy 11 degrees Celsius, that was the warmest Tyneside was going to be. Poor thing. I can imagine him shivering (literally), with a nose as proverbially red as that of Rudolph. I am sure the boy from the sunnier climes of Madras will have his task cut out -- adjusting to all the snow and the beautiful winter surroundings.
Apparently IB hadn’t eaten anything for close to 24 hours. It is a major problem if you are a vegetarian – in Europe or US or China, among others. Rest assured you will never be spoiled for choice there, as far as food is concerned. In fact, you will possibly have to survive on bread, cheese, milk, vegetables, pasta, eggs and their various combinations. I have been telling IB to learn the basics of cooking. Unfortunately, he has never set foot in a kitchen. And until now, he used to brag that he wouldn't even enter one. Once, when he was asked to crack open an egg and whip it up, he broke it on the kitchen counter, so that all the yolk slithered down and formed a nasty-smelling puddle on the floor. Then it was left to the other person to perform the clean-up operations. I’m pretty sure if IB had tried to wipe off the egg, it would have led to another catastrophe.
IB cannot boil water. Or cook an omelette or scrambled eggs. He has learnt how to cut and dice vegetables and did a good job with them (it was with great relief I noted that all his fingers were still intact after he was done with the knife and the chopping board). Plus food in the UK is super-expensive. I wonder how IB will sustain himself, more importantly – WHAT will he sustain himself on? I told him how he could cook stir-fried vegetables, or scrambled eggs, or make pasta – none of them require a lot of effort and are pretty simple to organise, along with the ingredients. But IB is lazy. And says he will survive on chips and bread and cheese, along with water. I properly pity the boy. From a plate of paneer dosai and steaming tumblers of kaapi to chips from cold storage and dry bread -- what a change it will be!
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