March 28, 2008 (Friday)

Gosh!! Another really tiring day..I am really so zapped up at the end of the day that I have no energy to do anything. I just want to crash and not wake up till the next morning. But there is so much to do before I sleep. You gotta read atleast one newspaper (especially the editorial), study, do this, do that....it seems like the tasks will never end. I just want to lie down and do nothing. And on top of that, you will always be misunderstood. Since you are the woman in a relationship, you are always supposed to be understanding and patient and sweet... no matter how tired you might be, no matter how fried your brain might me. You should be interested in everything he says even when you are tired. So what if he sounds un-interested even when you're talking and he's not tired? We can't call that unfair, can we??? That would be the biggest sin in the world! Oh no....you're a woman....you're strong and sensible and supposed to take all the crap doled out to you, just because you have amazing powers of tolerance. Just because you care enough for the other person to say something. Not because you are weak or something. Sick justice huh???

Brain's fried, refuses to register anything.....body's tired, refuses to respond to anything. I am no less than a zombie right now. And then people keep pestering you with what all they discussed with your best friend and all that shit....give me a break from all this shit and puerile behaviour. Spare me what you ate or drank or did throughout your day or wore to college or what your stupid ex-boyfriend said to you.....I really don't wanna know.....give me a fuckin break! I don't have to be everybody's favourite agony aunt...or a punching bag....ugghhhhh!!! I am going to live for myself and be as irritable and cranky as I like.....and I don't care if it hurts other people. I've had enough with putting everyone before me and thinking what they would like or what I should do to make them smile. No one makes even the tiniest effort to put a smile on my face right??? Huh!!! That's what happens.....but I'm happy I woke up to it....better late than never as they say....

Anyway, I am off to sleep now. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. Am hoping Ankita and Neha will be there to cheer me up and we will trouble Kunal the way we did today (and Mayank almost ended up believing that we were up to something mischievous!) God, that was fun!! Now that brings a smile to my face....Ciao!!!